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Dé Sathairn, Samhain 18, 2006

entitled
"Hamburglar with Bong"
$500 obo

At 3:46 i.n., Anonymous said...: that is goddamned hilarious. i just hope the mcdonalds corporation never, ever finds out about this. they have spies everywhere... watching... listening. they know all about that bad trade you made, shorting microsoft back in '93. they can tell when you're wearing sample stock from the warehouse. they know EVERYTHING!!
At 4:29 i.n., Anonymous said...: picky,
i found this while rummaging through an old trunk in the attic. i think its your old diary from the first time you went out west... here's an excerpt:
- brother matthew

this morning we crossed the missouri river. its not much to look at, but i feel we're making good progress. today we saw our first native and it was quite exciting! he was a savage looking brute without the first notion of how to properly accessorize. i mean what's up with all those beads?! so 1989! i sent my manservant jeffrey to discourse with the beastly fellow, and due to jeffrey's good nature, we were able to set up a parley with their chief. I quickly got to business and traded my old chanel compact and a lip gloss for almost 3000 hectares of prime bottomland! those guys are seriously retarded!

p.s.
call mom. they're really pissed about all that coffee...